Eyes Tell (Mostly) All
by Apple in the Ocean
Summary: Hiding secrets has always been one of Alex's strengths. But this time, perhaps his secret is too big to hide. Cast into the glittery world of showbiz for a new mission, will it be too hard to hide his secret amongst the flashing lights and ever curious K-Unit? After all- it's not a secret easily hidden. They do say lies start with the eyes. (Not related to The Price of a Collar)
1. Chapter 1

**AN- Well, another story for the Alex Rider fandom! Yeah...this one's been bugging me to write it. I thought I'd just post it as a chapter due to DrewtheSeagull, so you can thank him/her for that, guys! Erm, bearing in mind that I haven't yet finished ****_The Price of Collar, _****updates may be sporadic on this fic- so I need you to give me a boost, guys! I'm putting on extra work for you, so seriously- review! Anyway, here we have it! Newly titled ****_The Eyes Tell (Mostly) All _****thanks to Brackenfern! I'm sorry if I didn't use yours (particularly Titler- it was a close runner, I just thought that the part about him being changed into a girl for 7 years may've not quite fitted with the story- but thank you so much! It was a close call!), but thank you for helping me out! **

**(PS. It's short cos it's a prologue. Sorry 'bout that, but the chapters will be longer later on!)**

**Anyway! Onwards and upwards, fellow soldiers!**

* * *

**PROLOGUE-**

Alex opened his eyes.

The sound of a thumping clock reverberated uncomfortably through the thick silence of the house- like stifled breathing in an airless room.

Sighing, pushing himself out of bed, Alex shuffled towards the door of his room and swung it open, muttering as he stubbed his toe on the side in his drowsiness.

Heading towards the bathroom, Alex didn't withhold a sigh of bliss as warm water ran smoothly down his back and shoulder- allowing him to relax for once without the fear of some sort of attack.

_Although I'm sure some assassins wouldn't have any qualms at barging in and shooting me whilst I'm showering, _he mused.

His body stiffened.

Well, that just put a dampener on his enjoyment.

Sighing once again (it was obviously becoming a habit), he turned to shower off and dried himself off before stepping into his clothes, pausing to push a hand through his hair before exiting the bathroom to head downstairs and get some breakfast.

Humming some vague song,Alex pushed some bread in the toaster and leaned against the work surface until he heard it pop, collecting it, cursing as it burnt his hands, and successfully dropping it on the floor.

"Damn!" the shout was unexpected even to him and he clapped his mouth shut, eyes wide and heart pounding at the abruptness of the noise.

Silence crouched low and watched him with savage eyes.

Calming his thundering heartbeat and silently reprimanding the fear that shot through him, he tried to calm down (though his stifled breaths were _thunderous _in the immense silence. Loud loud loud). It was _OK, _he decided, though the shaking in his hands didn't seem to agree with him. _It's OK, Alex, you just surprised yourself, OK? _But he couldn't seem to fully calm down as he tried starting up his mindless humming (except it wasn't mindless anymore) again, deciding to abandon his toast to the predator of the floor and trail into the living room, still humming softly under his breath.

"TV. TV always helps to calm people down," he murmured, trying to ignore the fact that he spoke in barely a whisper, stubbornly attributing it to the fact that he didn't usually talk to himself, and so was just sparing himself the personal embarrassment.

Wandering to the television, forcing himself to relax his tense back muscles and act casual, he leaned over and pressed on.

He jerked back as noise screamed into the room.

The noise was blaring and cut through the silence of the house in obnoxious and frightening clarity. Eyes wide and breaths shallow in his chest, he dropped to the floor momentarily, stunned by the _loudness _of the noise. Sucking in panicked breaths, scrambling for the remote and cursing under his breath, Alex desperately tried to find it within the cracks between the sofa. Tears almost sprung to his eyes as the noise continued to shout over the silence. Almost hunching down, Alex finally found the remote and with clumsy fingers, one hand pressed over his ear, he managed to turn the sound onto mute.

And suddenly now the Silence was deafening.

Gasping out breaths, Alex struggled up to a standing position- sure that at any moment something word burst from within the confines of Silence and pounce on him. Slowly, he backed away, flinched as Silence leered at him, decided that he couldn't take it anymore and ran out of the room, grabbing up his jacket and keys, unlocking the door, and diving out before Silence could claim him.

As Sunlight grasped him in a firm and friendly hold, Alex allowed his tension to leave him. _This is better, _he decided as he hopped down the steps of his house, hands burrowed securely in his pockets. _No more quiet. That's good._

Outside _always _had a sound. Whether it was the sound of cars on the street, birds singing lustily up to the heavens or wind passing apologetically through trees, bushes and grass; there was always some little orchestra playing here or there.

It was relaxing.

Alex found himself sitting on a bench (no need to hum here) and wishing that he had eaten the toast, grumbling as he realised that when he got back, he was going to have to clean up the mess he had made on the kitchen floor.

Briefly, Alex allowed himself to close his eyes and forget about the screams of memories that clawed for _outoutout _in his head, letting the calmness of outdoors was over him. This was _nice. _No running from bullets or making up lies here.

Just him; the trees, the bench and-

_Ring! Ring! Ring!_

He peeled one eye open.

Of course.

He was _always _interrupted _just _when he was enjoying himself.

With a less than gracious look on his face, he tugged out the phone from his trouser pockets and snapped it open. "Yes?" he demanded.

"Alex Rider, it has come to our attention that-"

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, cutting the sweet voice off. Then, speaking louder, he tipped his head to the sky, staring wistfully up at it. "I'll be there in ten,"

"We'll send a car," came the automatic response.

"No, I'll-" Alex cut himself off, hesitating. "OK," he grumbled. "Fine," might as well sit and enjoy it where he could.

"A car will arrive to your location shortly."

Alex didn't even bother asking how they knew where he was, and just hung up, stuffing the phone back into his pocket and closing his eyes again. Well, there went goodbye to his relaxing day of nothingness.

Perfect.

The car _did _indeed arrive 'shortly'- which was a disappointment to Alex who was just enjoying the not-quite-silence of the area around him when he heard the sound of a car engine. Alex sat up as the sound of footsteps approached him and a man stood in front of him.

"Alex Rider?" the deep voice was somewhat threatening in it's lowness.

Alex pulled back, stammering. "N-no! Who are you? W-what do you want?" he drew his arms protectively up to his chest.

The man paused. "Sorry, son. Forget you ever saw me,"

Alex dropped the act, rolling his eyes and letting his posture drop back into that of himself. "It was a _joke. _You sounded like you needed a bit of laughter in your life, right?" he grinned up at the man.

The man, or Agent did not seem impressed at all. "You're wasting time. Follow me,"

Alex's eyes lost their cheer and his countenance suddenly went cold. "Badge," he barked out, thrusting a hand forward.

He closed his hand as the Agent dropped the badge into his open hand. Glaring suspiciously at the item and flipping it over, Alex twisted it upside down and around, tapping at the badge and "hmm"ing in a critical way. Finally done, he handed it back to the exasperated Agent, nodding sharply and standing up. "You'll do," he clapped his hands. "Well then? Let's go!"

Growling lowly, a little insulted now at haven been given this job, he turned sharply on one heel and led the teen to the car.

The journey was uneventful- a little boring as the Agent had clammed up and only spoke to snap at Alex to "shut up" in which Alex had retorted with a muttered "touchy", almost _hearing _the tightness of the Agent's fists around the steering wheel.

Finally, they arrived, and Alex hopped out of the car, waving wildly as the Agent gratefully sped away, calling after him to "not forget me!"

It would only be later that the Agent would find a piece of paper with 'Alex' written on it in swirly letters coupled with his number and a 'Call me' followed by a winky face.

Needless to say, that bit of paper ended up in his fire the following second.

Jogging up the stairs and into the building, Alex ignored the people milling about inside, and carefully stepped up towards the lift, waiting to hear it ping before near diving inside and pressing the right button towards the floor that he needed.

Whistling softly to himself, Alex twitched as he heard the door ping and then hesitantly exited, treading towards the right door and counting softly and needlessly under his breath.

Reaching the right door, he knocked once and entered.

"I would appreciate it if you waited to be called in before entering," the cool voice of Mr Blunt flowed into his ears.

Alex feigned a distressed expression. "Sorry about that! I just, you know, love being in here so much that I just sometimes _forget. _This _is, _after all, like the home I've never wanted," so saying, he flopped into the chair in front of the desk and glared at the person behind it.

"That's nice to hear," was the dry reply. "But you haven't been called here to banter." a pause, a shuffling of papers on the desk. Suspiciously, Alex's eyes followed the movement. "You've been called here for a new mission,"

Alex's eyes widened. "Are you being serious?" he near shrieked. "But I only came here because I thought you'd arranged to have a teddy bear picnic with me!" he dragged one shaking hand down his face. "This is terrible! I made up Belinda Bear _specifically _because I thought that's what we were going to do!"

"Enough!" Blunt snapped, silencing Alex. "This is an important mission that you _will _accept, Alex,"

Alex sobered.

"Good." Mr Blunt got down to business. "Now, here's the-"

Alex jumped as the door slammed open, turning to stare at the person who had just flung themselves into the office.

"Blunt. _What _are you doing?" the voice belonged to Mrs Jones- and she didn't sound pleased.

"I am merely discussing with Alex what his next mission will be,"

Alex winced at the sharp intake of breath. "Blunt," she hissed, striding over to his side. "I thought we'd _talked _about this!"

"And we had," he cut in smoothly. "I just made up my mind,"

"And?" the question was tense, Alex found himself holding his breath along with Mrs Jones.

"And he is too good to lose," Mr Blunt finished easily.

"Alan!" Mrs Jones near-slammed her hand on the desk. "We can't-"

"We have, Tulip," Mr Blunt interrupted coldly. "We have already used him, and he has proved his worth,"

"But can't you _see? _This is too far! Using him before was a little-"

"Can I speak?" Alex complained, rubbing his hand against the leather of the chair.

"No," Mrs Jones snapped before turning back to Alan Blunt, ignoring Alex who grumbled about people needing to loosen up nowadays. "This is too far, Blunt! We can't do this anymore!"

"Why not?"

The question seemed to make Mrs Jones freeze.

Alex looked up.

Mr Blunt repeated the question slowly, burningly. "Why not, Mrs Jones?"

Audibly, she swallowed, glancing down at the teen who was staring at her. "Because..."

"Because?"

Alex gritted his teeth, glaring at the woman, daring her to say it, to say it, to say-

"Because he's blind!" she burst out finally, her voice loud and awkward in the tense room. She dragged a hand down her face, twisting her head the other way. "He's _blind, _Alan."

Alex closed his sightless eyes.

How he hated that word.

_Blind._

And when Mr Blunt next spoke, his voice was cold, ice.

"Your point, Mrs Jones?"

* * *

**AN- There you are! Now, you know what I said! Review, please! It's the only thing that will make me give you updates on this at least ****_closer _****to a happy timing! I don't mind what you have to say (unless it's utterly evil), so please say it! Tell me what you think, and you should be hearing from me soon!**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN- DID I SURPRISE YOU? Well, be surprised! Ha! A huge thanks to ALL of your reviews! They all mattered! And thanks to Bastet'syoungestkitten for her help with the blindness part. Thank you very much!**

* * *

Alex did not like to _think _about when he had lost his sight.

Much less talk about it.

"Well, that was a pleasant discussion." Alex stood up, knowing that Mrs Jones was probably not able to look at him (she never _had _been able to spend much time around him after-) and Mr Blunt probably _was, _that expressionless expression slipped onto his face like a mask. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd much rather go somewhere, and, you know, talk about things I'd much rather like to hear. Good day to-"

"Sit back down, Alex," Mr Blunt ordered.

Alex rolled his useless eyes but sat down accordingly, making sure to sigh a bit in exasperation before he did. _"What?" _

"Alan, you can't possibly think to use Alex as an Agent now," Mrs Jones hissed, recovering from her guilty lapse of silence. From the sound of faint shuffling of material, it sounded as if she had taken another step towards Mr Blunt. "There are certain _requirements-"_

"One of which is being 18 years of age without parental consent. These are mere disturbances, Mrs Jones. Alex is _far _beyond what any _requirement _may try to do." his voice was dismissive, already bored of the conversation.

"Look," Alex interrupted again, holding one hand up and twitching his brows higher, eyes latching onto where he could hear Mr Blunt's voice coming from. "I didn't come hear to be talked about. So, please. _What do you want?" _

Slight pause, rustling of paper, exhalation of breath."A mission, Alex,"

"_Alan," _tightly reigned in anger stretched the word out to an almost strangled quality.

"Tulip." Alex shifted back at the sudden sharp voice. "This was the reason that _I did not _allow you to attend this meeting. Although you are a very trusted deputy, I _will not _allow you to undermine my authority. I have worked this Department for years now- and quite frankly, Mrs Jones, if you continue to attempt to tell me what to do, I shall make sure that there are devastating consequences. Do I make myself clear?"

Again, a pause filled with only soft breathing and the sound of the wind talking to the window. "Yes, sir. I apologise." Mrs Jones' voice was soft, and Alex could imagine her head dipped, that familiar blank look sliding onto her face.

"Should've brought some popcorn," Alex murmured near under his breath.

"Returning to the matter at hand," Mr Blunt ignored Alex's quip and seemed to turn back to face him, Alex could feel his eyes boring into his own, and shifted his own brown eyes accordingly. "We have a mission for you." he paused, and Alex leaped in to fill it.

"For me?" he asked, voice suspicious. "What's that meant to mean?" after so long with working with Mr Blunt, he had developed the ability to be able to see meanings in every single one of his words. Not being able to see his expression made it easier somewhat, too. People let a lot go with tiny inflictions in their tone of voice, or the simple usage of certain words.

"Yes. It's been waiting for you for quite a while, actually. If you would, Mrs Jones,"

The woman didn't say anything for a few moments, and Alex waited expectantly, when she did speak, it wasn't what he was hoping to hear. "Mr Blunt, forgive me please, but I must satiate my curiosity."

(curiosity killed the cat, Rider)

_Taptaptaptap, _Alex's ears twitched towards the sound of fingers drumming against a desk, and he mentally pictured Mr Blunt's faintly exasperated face. "By all means, Mrs Jones."

Frowning, Alex turned back to Mrs Jones, the smell of peppermint suddenly stronger as Alex listened to her muffled footsteps move closer to him.

"Hello, Alex,"

"Hello..." he said warily, glancing over to where he knew Mr Blunt would be.

Alex flickered his eyes back to her when he sensed some sort of hesitation. The sound of crumpling fabric and the soft hitch of breath warned him of her hands reaching out for his.

Very subtly, he moved them out of the way and gave a wan smile. "Please, Mrs Jones, I'm sure you can ask me what you want just as you are,"

Another hitch in breath _(strangled, a little pained) _before the breathing went back to normal and Alex felt displaced air wash softly across him as she sat down in front of him. "Tell me, Alex. Why do you seem so...willing to do this mission?" _(sound of an opening mouth. Dabbing lips with a tongue?) _"You were given a way out when..." she didn't bother to finish the sentence, and for that, Alex was glad. "You have no reason to do the missions anymore, Alex. _Less, _perhaps after- just answer me that, Alex. Why do you insist on doing them?"  
He blinked at her and lifted a hand to rub at his eyes, noting the sound that gave away her tiny flinch.

Why did he do it, then?

The reason was simple, really.

"Because I can."

"Excuse me?"

Sighing once again, (seriously, he _really _needed to stop doing that) he dragged one hand through his hair and flopped further back into his chair, eyes staying pinned on where he knew her to be, his hunch proved right at the sound of her surprised murmur as they managed to pin what he believed to be her eyes. "I was always a spy before because I didn't have a chance to say no. But now...I can choose. And _I'm _saying that I'm not about to let blindness get in the way of _anything _I do. I can do it- and I don't need my sight to be able to do so."

The drumming of fingers had stopped.

"So...an act of stubbornness?"

Alex bristled at the comment and glared at the woman. "_No. _It's what I _do. _I'm a spy now whether I like it or not. There's no going back now- losing my sight just proved it." Alex _didn't _say how the idea of giving into his loss of sight, how having to live an ordinary life _without _his sight terrified him. He didn't say how it was necessary to prove the sympathetic airs of people _wrong. _To prove them that he hadn't lost his worth as a spy. And, most importantly, he _definitely_ _didn't _say how he _needed _the rush, the adrenalin, the noise and the _purpose _now. How he couldn't bare to live in silence. The noise was part of him now. He _thrived _on it.

And going on a mission was just a way to get that drug like substance back into his system.

Not even going blind would take that away from him.

OK.

Well, that wasn't the _main _reason. The main reason was revenge. Revenge. And the only way to get revenge on the people who- the only way to get revenge was through MI6. And Mr Blunt knew that. So, the whole blackmail thing? It was still there. But more silent; and something that Alex was starving for.

So he didn't bother to mention it.

"Very well," Mrs Jones didn't sound like she believed what she was saying and Alex listened as she moved away from him and slipped back to stand by Mr Blunt.

"If that is all, I would like to continue with the mission briefing," Mr Blunt drawled, boredom evident in his voice.

"Fire away," Alex muttered, leaning back into the chair and resisting the common urge to close his eyes that had plagued him ever since losing his sight.

"This has been an...ongoing mission of which we had ready for you before you lost your sight. As such, it is _necessary _that you are the one to take the mission." Alex hummed a vague reply back and waited for the man to continue. "Tell me, Alex. Have you ever wanted to see the upcoming movie _Losing Vanessa_?"

Alex raised one eyebrow as he thought. Vaguely, he could remember hearing the girls in his school squealing about it in a corner and in the cafeteria for what seemed a long while back (and _seeing _them, too. Colours and all). But he had never personally held the desire to watched it. Oddly enough, having to constantly fight for your life didn't allow time to sit down and watch movies.

_Won't ever get the chance to watch it anyway anymore._

Shaking the thought off, Alex shook his head in negative. "Nope. Heard of it, though,"

"Very good," Mrs Jones replied a little vaguely, still not happy with the way things were going, Alex supposed. He clenched his jaw and sat up straighter. Well, she was just going to have to deal with it, then. "Perhaps you've heard of the two main actors in it? Elizabeth or Beth Melgroves and Milo Summers?"

Alex snorted outwardly. He had _definitely _he heard of them. "Yeah, the girls at school won't shut up about him and the boys seem hung up on the Elizabeth girl," he paused momentarily, wondering why he sounded so detached from his own school mates before carrying on irately, tiring of being asked about things that he'd _never be able to see _anyway. "Why are you asking me this, anyway? Does it really matter what movies I like to watch?"

"Alex," Mr Blunt said, the faintest tinge of amusement seeping into his voice. "It matters _very _much. I'd like to formally introduce you to your new persona, _Milo Summers,_"

Alex blinked.

And then blinked again. "_Excuse me?_" he asked incredulously.

Mrs Jones took over then, her voice attracting his attention. "Milo Summers has never really existed, Alex," Alex's eyes began to widen; he could see where this was going. "Milo Summers is _you _Alex. He has been you ever since the first time you walked into MI6's office,"

"What?" he asked faintly, barely aware of the question coming from his mouth.

"Indeed," Mr Blunt commented, tapping something onto his desk. "Milo Summers has been an identity we forged for you quite some time ago- the mission has been...held on standby somewhat with the other busy issues going on, but we have withheld placing you on the _scene _so to speak-" Alex cringed at Blunt's attempt at humour. "-for much too long now. We cannot afford to wait any longer,"

"Wait, what-" Alex held up his hands, gesturing for them to slow down. "What do you _mean _this has been an identity you've forged for what- a year and a bit?" confused, he stared at them. "_Why?"_

Clearing his throat, Mr Blunt made to explain. "It was a simple matter of getting photographs of you and enhancing them to place into gossip magazines and columns. The uprising star- Milo Summers. And of course, staging interviews was a simple matter of introducing you to the public- making Milo become more real. As to matters of _why-" _he raised his voice as Alex attempted to interrupt. "-it is because of the problem that is currently in the entertainment business at this moment in time." Alex heard the man suck in a heavy breath. "The girl who you are to be co-starring with- Beth Melgroves- well, her father is an extremely wealthy man, the manager of the entertainment company that you will be infiltrating- Melgroves Media.

"Recently, it has come to our attention that money from her father- Richard Melgroves has been slipping into an unauthorised account of which we know is used frequently by the larger criminal organisations."

_Larger criminal organisations..._Alex's heart began to beat faster, and he held the armrests of his chair tighter. No. He wouldn't jump to conclusions. He would listen to what Mr Blunt had to say.

"It is under our belief that for quite sometime Mr Melgrove is part of one of the various groups included in this account. Recently, we have been informed that his money has started going towards a slightly more dangerous and unexpected group, though. The group of which you know to be the past disbanded SCORPIA.

"Recently, we have found out through...various means that the organisation has once again been taken over. This time by a slightly more...extravagant character- a man called Pierre Thierry. Thierry is slightly more forthcoming with the way in which he handles the newly revived organisation, and has made it a clear goal to get SCORPIA into the position of high esteem that it once was in before.

"We have reasons to believe that SCORPIA is trying to sink it's way into the media- an extremely powerful and influential position that we cannot allow them to have. Imagine the repercussions of allowing SCORPIA to have control over the media- it would be a truly devastating thing to allow to happen.

"We need you to get close to Beth Melgroves and attempt to- under your alias- get into contact with Richard Melgroves to find out what he's up to- try and find his favour as much as possible. It should be relatively simple. Stick to your disguise, make a friend and meet her father- and then relay the information straight back to us."

Alex had sat silently through Mr Blunt's talk, his face not giving anything away. He found that it was easier to control his facial expressions now that he was concentrating more on what was around him rather than what he himself was doing. But he couldn't help the slightly wild grin that almost twitched onto his face at the mention of SCORPIA.

SCORPIA, who had destroyed everything in his life before the moment he could even touch it. Had taken it away from him even when it had been _right there in his hands._

_ SCORPIA. _"They always did like flashy things, didn't they?" he muttered, barely able to keep the anticipated strain from his voice.

"It's not going to be an easy mission," Mrs Jones warned, although Alex was certain that Mr Blunt was glaring at her. "When we created your new identity, you were able to see. Now, you can't and this fact _cannot _be allowed to be made known to anyone other than us and yourself."

Alex's eyebrows raised. "Why not just," he flapped a vague hand. "You know...say that this _Milo _had some sort of accident and now he's blind? Easy." he nodded shortly, deeming it done.

"It's not quite as easy as that, Alex," Mrs Jones retorted. She seemed to have made it a goal to torment him over his personal choice to do the mission. Typical. When he- out of his own volition- decided to actually _do _a mission out of his own means, they decided to try and _put him off. _Could he _never _catch a break? "You are being hired to act in this movie by a multi-billion earning director. He did not hire a blind teenager to act his leading male part- as horrible as it sounds. He hired a _seeing _teenager. That's what he's paying for. If he finds out that he's paying for someone who _hasn't _got everything that he's spending money on, he'd quickly cast you aside. The entertainment business is harsh, Alex,"

Snorting, Alex cupped his hands behind his head and half closed his eyes- the picture of casualness. "So," he drawled. "Just act in front of dozens of people, learn a script I can't even _read _and try and trick everyone into believing that I'm not _blind." _he bit out the word as if even allowing it to reside in his mouth was sickening. "Easy." his voice was flat.

"Which is why we are giving you back-up." Mr Blunt replied, voice dull and toneless. Alex's eyebrow shot up. Blunt? Giving him _back-up? _What on earth was the world coming to? "Of which, of course, will be posing as your own personal group of bodyguards."

"Who are they going to be?" Alex asked slowly, uncertain as to whether he'd want to live in a room with a bunch of strangers who he'd never _seen _before and would never be _able _to see. Uncomfortably, his heartbeat sped up a rate though he didn't let it show on his face.

"We have decided to give you the liberty of choosing this time," Mr Blunts voice seemed to show that he knew _exactly _what Alex's worries were and derived some small pleasure at knowing the fact. "But we have chosen the person to act as your manager during the period in which you'll be on your mission." the familiar sound of creaking leather, a soft click and then: "Call in Agent Daniels,"

Alex couldn't help the sudden smile on his face as he turned around when he heard the door open. "Ben!" he beamed, listening as the footsteps came closer to him.

"Hello, Alex," came the warm voice in reply and Alex's smile widened, rolling in the luxury of being able to draw up a mental image of Ben in his mind. To be able to _see _him because he could remember what the man who had worked with him _looked like._

"Agent Daniels will be acting as your manager in this mission, Alex," Mr Blunt's voice drew Alex's attention away from Ben and he forced himself to focus on the man who still sat in the chair. "Here are your files. I expect you to read and memorize them well. It is of _vital _importance that you don't prove faulty on _any _of the facts contained within this folder. From now on, Alex, Daniels, you will be under _constant _surveillence from the media and from the public. You must _always _remain wary of just who is watching you. Breaking your cover would result in the downfall of the entire mission and," Alex, as he reached out for the folder felt Blunts eyes on him as the mans voice dropped a notch. "terrible consequences on each of you personally,"

Alex busied himself with opening the file instead of focussing on the sudden rush of dread that rushed through his body.

"Alex, Daniels; in ten minutes time you will be conducting interviews into who will be acting as your bodyguards for the mission. I have decided to only invite units from the SAS and SOD as their mission is not that of a spy's, but rather to assist the spies in their work and to be able to act quick in a situation with the tact of a soldier."

Alex nodded and could feel Ben nodding beside him.

Suddenly, Alex felt a whole lot braver about this mission.

"Remember what we discussed, Alex. Do not blow _either _cover," Mrs Jones said, cold voice catching him off guard.

Ah.

His shoulders sank slightly, a little deflated, his sightless eyes dropping to the carpet, suddenly feeling _not _that strong.

_But I can do it. I _have _to do it, _he thought, fists clenched in determination. "I won't," he said boldly, blind eyes blazing as they fixed themselves onto Mrs Jones.

"Don't fail, Alex,"

Alex licked at his dry lips, eyes flickering over to Mr Blutn who had spoken. He knew what those words meant. They meant don't fail _him _or _himself. _"I won't." he repeated, a little quieter now. And he _wouldn't. _There was no way that he would fail. Not now. Not ever.

"Come on then, Alex. Time to meet your bodyguard hopefuls." a gentle hand on his back made him flinch minutely but he quickly turned it into a movement from his stifled laughter.

"Sure..._hopeful. _I'm sure they are," he scoffed, allowing Ben to lead him out of the office.

He couldn't see him, but Alex could imagine the man grinning at him as he clapped him on the back. And this time, Alex didn't flinch because he expected it. "Well, this is the most interesting sounding mission I've had in a long time."

"Yeah?" Alex raised his eyebrows inquisitively as Ben pressed the button on the lift, figuring the older man knew where to go as he hadn't been told anything. "What've you been doing so far, then?"

"Desk work," he moaned, stepping into the lift as it came, Alex hastily following. "What about you? Any more crazy stunts?"

Alex forced a laugh. "Depends what you mean by 'crazy stunts'," he answered evasively, glancing at the man stood beside him.

A little silence made Alex shift uncomfortably.

He _hated _silences.

"Um, Ben?" he asked hesitantly.

"Are you OK, Alex?" the man broke in suddenly, voice a mix of concern and curiosity.

His heart began thudding, and inwardly he cursed over and over again. Had he blown it before he even got out of MI6 _headquarters? _He couldn't have! He- he _needed _this mission! "What do you mean? I'm fine," he frowned a little, covering his internal panic with a face any poker player would've killed for.

Another clouded pause. "Yes. Sorry, you just look a little...vacant. I don't know. Sorry,"

_Vacant? What's _that _meant to mean? _"Vacant?" he attempted to prompt. If he was to ever get this whole I'm-blind-but-trying-to-trick-you-into-believing-I 'm-not thing down, he would have to start finding out just what he needed to work on.

"No, don't worry about it. It's just me," the mans voice was airy but Alex still caught the tiny hint of confusion behind it. His mouth went dry. He couldn't allow Ben to work this out.

"I'm just really tired," he seemed to cave in, rubbing a hand across his eyes. "I've just been...on a mission not too long ago. Sorry if I'm not all that responsive. It was pretty hard," he said quietly. Not a lie, but not one that he wanted to expand on.

Ben seemed to realise this, and his voice audibly softened. "Not at all, Alex. It's not easy going on missions," _especially when you're only fifteen years old. _

The attachment hadn't been placed alongside the spoken words, but Alex heard it all the same. He opened his mouth to try and say something but the familiar _swish _alerted him to the elevator doors to having opened.

"Come on, Alex,"

Quickly, Alex followed Ben, sniffing lightly at the cool and _unknown _air. He didn't know this place. Warily, he followed the sound of Ben's footsteps, careful to keep exactly behind him less there were things he was avoiding.

If Ben noticed his odd decision of walking behind him, he didn't say anything, and soon there was the sound of a door opening and Alex was inside another room, following Ben again to where he sat down.

Tapping the chair lightly with his leg to make sure he didn't do anything embarrassing like completely miss and fall flat out on his rear end, he sat down on the chair and pulled in closer to the table that was in front of him. "So," he began, his voice echoing oddly around the room. "What's this going to be like?"

Ben chuckled, and Alex didn't move as Ben tapped at the folder that Alex had placed on his desk. "Maybe you should read this to find out, it'd be easier to read it than to have me try to explain everything to you."

Alex's heart sank as his eyes fell onto the paper that (he _knew _was _right _there. White and clean with black print. Black print like he used to read. Used to read and _see_) he wouldn't be able to read. "Ah, yeah. Sure." Leaning on one hand, Alex drew a fumbling hand across the text, frowning at it as if he was reading it.

"Having trouble there?" Ben asked softly.

Alex jumped. "Huh? Wha- _no! _Of course not!" he laughed, waving a hand at him.

Alex could feel Ben smirking. "Oh, sorry. I just didn't know the first page was that difficult to read."

_The first page? _Blankly, he stared at him.

_The first page._

His face flared red and he muttered something before quickly flipping to the next page, attempting to ignore Ben's outright laughter. _Of course,_ he scowled angrily to himself in his head. _The front page of all mission briefings is only the Agents name and the name of the mission._

"Alright, alright," he grumbled as Ben's laughter showed no sign of stopping, trying to quench his own _(childish) _hurt.

A creak of the door made Alex look up sharply, and a soft voice called out to them. "Agent Daniels and Agent-" the voice did a double take before quickly smoothing itself out. Alex rolled his eyes, knowing that the woman would've looked at him and been shocked into momentary speechlessness. "-Rider. The first group is here to be interviewed,"

"Fabulous," Ben's grin was evident through the brightness of his voice. "Well then! Send them in!"

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

* * *

Rubbing at his eyes, Alex stifled a groan.

If he had to sit through _one more _interview... Teeth gritting, he clenched at his pen with barely restrained violence, imagining all of the destruction he could cause with it.

"When they said an _Agent, _I didn't expect a barely-out-of-nappies kid!" an obnoxious voice called from beyond the desk he and Ben were sat behind.

"Well," Alex said, voice seemingly friendly. "Just because you only got out of nappies when you hit 18, it doesn't mean that the _rest _of us hold your weak bladder and bowel problems,"

The man spluttered amidst the sound of Ben's snort of laughter and his units joint muffled laughter and complaint.

"Next!" Alex yelled.

When group number 14 had left, Ben leaned over to him and murmured. "I quite liked number 7." his voice rang with mirth.

Blankly, Alex stared at the man. "Go on. Try and leave me in a room with group number 7. I dare you. It'll be like a miniature Hunger Games. Except the odds will _all _be in my favour,"

Ben chuckled at that, but didn't say anything else as the next group came in.

Alex only stopped listening to their interview after one of them spluttered about his youth. Blanking them out and leaving Ben to attempt to reason with them, Alex focussed on trying to figure out what he was going to _do. _They needed the right people to be his bodyguards. They would, after all, all be staying together and would need to build up a strong bond of trust if they were to get through the mission with as few slip ups as possible. Chewing on his pen, gazing out into the distance (or maybe not, as one of the soldiers barked at him to stop staring), Alex just _knew _that there was no way that he wanted to work with a bunch of soldiers whom he couldn't see and whose facial expressions would be utterly lost on him.

They needed to find a group who could-

"Alex."

Irately, he turned towards Ben, frustrated at having been broken out of his train of thought. "_Yes?"_

"Woo. Easy, Tiger." Ben seemed to consider his words. "Rider. Easy, Rider. Hey, that sounds-"

"I get it," Alex muttered, and then louder. "What?"

"The next group is ready,"

"Huh?" he looked around fruitlessly, confused. "What happened to the other group?"

"I threw them out."

"Oh. Right. Yeah, I knew that,"

"Of course you did. The next group, then,"

"OK," he said impatiently, tapping his pen down on the desk.

"I just want you to know," Ben's slightly wary tone immediately put Alex on edge, his eyes flickering around, _wishing _he could see. "I picked this team personally."

"Yeah?" Alex forced casualness. "That's OK," pointedly, he gestured towards the door, asking to call them in.

Ben ignored his gesture and pressed on, voice oddly pleading and urgent all in one. "Just because I picked them, it doesn't mean that you have to. But- just- just give them a chance, yeah?"

Alex arched one elegant eyebrow. "Ben," he said plainly, voice dry. "I've sat through _15 _of these interviews. If you've recommended one, that's a blessing in itself. Next!" he shouted.

A frown began to slip onto Alex's face when there came no reply, and his mouth began opening to call again when he heard voices.

"That was us!"

"What?"

"We've just been called!"

"Seriously?! Quick! How does my hair look?"

"Shut _up! _Just get in there!"

Alex's mouth had gradually begun to drop at the sound of the muffled voices, and now it hung wide open, he turned to gape wide eyed at Ben who he could only guess shrugged and gave him a joint mischevious and bashful look in return.

The door burst open and the chattering filled the room until one voice broke through the noise.

"It's Fox!" and then, a surprised sort of pause. "No _way! _It's _Cub!"_

Recovering from his shock, Alex smiled slowly. "Hello, K-Unit,"

Oh, this was _grand. _Absolutely _grand._

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

* * *

"So, what? _You're _an Agent?" Eagle's voice was oddly loud as he spoke to Alex, coming to flop into one of the chairs in front of their desk.

"Yeah, well," Alex's voice was quickly cut off by the familiar growl of Wolf.

"I _told _you something fishy was going on!"  
"Yeah, yeah," came the dismissive voice of Snake. "But, Cub? What's going on? You're Agent Rider?"

Alex grinned, leaning back into his chair. "You guessed it!" his grin split wider as they all burst into a frenzy of noisy question after question.

"Nice to meet you, Raccoon, my name's Ben Daniels, or Fox as my old unit like to still call me," Alex turned at the sound of the voice even over all of this noise.

"Yeah, you too," a slight rattle and Alex assumed Ben had leaned over his desk to shake hands with Raccoon.

Raccoon.

_I wonder what he looks like, _a wistful voice whispered.

_Shut up! _He snapped mentally, shoving the lily threaded voice away (even though it wrenched at his heart and made his eyes feel all funny. Like- like they were filling with-). "So," Alex spoke loudly to be heard over the cacophony of questions. "I take it you all know what you're being interviewed for?"

Wolf's less than polite response made Alex wince and Ben snapped at him to shut it. From then on, things just went off track again.

"_You _shut it!" came the not-so-snarky comeback.

"Oh, that's great. Really wounded me there, Wolf,"

"Need some first aid, Fox?" Snake joined in.

"Yeah. Seriously. That comeback just hurt _so _much. Ouch. I think you just tore a hole in my heart."

"Oh be _quiet," _Wolf snarled, but his voice held some grudging humour to it.

"Where've you been, you guys, anyway? Why didn't you tell us that you knew Cub, Fox?" Eagle just wasn't giving up on his line of questioning.

"Something called the Official Secrets Act, Eagle," Ben replied, voice amused.

"Uh, can someone maybe, I don't know..._fill me in?"  
_

"Oh, sorry, newbie," Fox seemed to be smiling.

"I'm _not _a newbie!" came the irate voice.

"Sorry." he didn't sound very sorry.

"...It's OK."

"Newbie." Eagle whispered.

A sound of a slap and muffled laughter signified a high-five.

"Oh, ha ha ha. Aren't you _hilarious?"_

"Come on, guys. Just tell him what's going on."

"This is Fox and Cub. They used to be members of K-Unit."

Alex allowed the voices to wash over him. Noisy, loud, full of bursts of laughter and whenever there was a silence, it was always _full _of something.

Alex closed his eyes and breathed in softly, barely able to keep the satisfied smile off of his face.

_Noise. _They were so _noisy. _

And that was _perfect._

He opened his eyes.

"You're hired,"

The voices stopped.

Ben coughed a little. "That's great, Alex, but don't you think you should-"

"Nope." he answered cheerily. "You're hired." ignoring Ben's attempts at getting him to think over his decision more, he turned and beamed at them (and he could remember _their _faces too. He _wouldn't _have to live with a bunch of faceless strangers except for Raccoon!). "Congratulations!"

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It would be a direct lie to say that Alex Rider hadn't changed.

As Ben stood watching Alex have his disguise applied, he couldn't help but wonder over that fact, blocking out the loud voices of K-Unit who stood next to him, arguing over something mindless, no doubt. Alex had _changed- _and he couldn't tell whether or not it was bad or not.

"He's different, isn't he?"

Ben glanced towards Snake who leaned against the wall next to him, eyes fixed on Alex who was scowling at the woman who was attempting to style his hair, rubbing some liquid over it to turn it an ash blond.

He flickered his eyes back. "Yeah," Ben answered quietly, head thumping back into the wall. "I don't know though...he just seems more..." he struggled for the right word.

"Lively?" Snake supplied.

Nodding gratefully, Ben crumpled his brow. "Yes. That's it. He's been much more chatty. Last time he was always so _quiet. _Reserved. But now he seems the exact opposite. I can't get him to stop talking," a small smile graced his lips- one that showed that he didn't mind. The smile fell a little as he continued to speak, still thinking. "He seems almost completely changed- and I can't quite decide whether the change is _natural _or not. I sometimes get the feeling that he's almost forcing himself." he finished quietly, turning to look at Snake to gauge his reaction.

Snake also looked at Ben. " I know what you mean. Did you see the way he was chatting with Eagle on the way here? I never thought I'd see Alex be able to near beat Eagle in levels of volume," he mused. His look sobered soon after. "Tell me, how much do you know about Alex being an-" he cringed visibly. "-_Agent?"_

Uncomfortably, Ben shrugged. "Not too much," he admitted, hesitating. "I...worked with him on one occasion, but that's it. He's very- how should I say it?- _unusual. _When I was working with him, I could just tell that it wasn't his first mission." he smiled ruefully. "I can't tell you much, but I knew that much. He seems to have had some tough goings on in his life."

Snake shook his head slowly, foot tapping at the floor, displeasure clear on his face. "It's not right," he muttered a little angrily. "Using a _kid _for that type of work. It's terrible. How could anyone even think of doing that?"

"But you're still taking the mission?" Ben probed, his eyes examining Snake's own.

The man snorted and crossed his arms. "Of course we are," he scoffed, cringing as Eagle received a wallop from Wolf and Raccoon. "We can hardly allow a kid that we know go into danger without offering our assistance," he glared up at Fox, but it held warmth that was not lost on Fox. "Besides," he continued quietly. "We're all teammates here. We're not going to leave any of you to fight alone,"

Ben couldn't restrain his burst of a grin and his blue eyes crinkled. "Snake, I always knew-"

"_Don't!"_

They turned around sharply at the sudden voice, Wolf's, Eagle's and Raccoon's voices lapsing into silence as they also turned to see what was going on.

Alex stood up, his chair clattered behind him, one hand over his eyes, the other clawing in front of him at the pale faced woman who had backed into her trolley of products. She stood frozen, fear evident on her face. Swallowing visibly, she weakly showed the vial that was in her hand, trying to explain in a squeaking and trembling voice. "It's only a colour changer for your eyes, Alex," she managed to take a step forward. "You just need a few drops in your-"

"_Don't!" _Alex's voice was louder this time, a sharp edge of hysteria creeping into his tone. "_Don't touch my eyes!" _his hand was still cupped protectively over them, and he took another staggering step backwards.

For some reason, a wave of guilt seemed to flood over the womans face. "I- it's important-" her plea was cut off by Alex's ragged voice.

"Give it here. I'll do it."

She shrank back from him. "I-I-"

"Give it _here," _he punctuated in a hiss, hand never moving from his eyes.

Hands trembling, she handed the vial over and Alex snatched it from her, turning away from them all as he tipped his head back and dropped the contents into his eyes. When he finished, he spun around and near threw the vial at the woman, face contorted into a snarl, fear tinging the edges of the expression as she juggled clumsily with it.

"I'm done," his voice was flat, but lined with something else that Ben couldn't identify. The teen turned his head to him. "Do you need to have your disguise put on?"

Ben laughed, though it was tense. "I've already had mine done," he gestured to his recently died brown hair and darker shade of blue eyes as well as his darker skin.

Alex paused a little and his expression drooped for some reason. "Oh yeah." he murmured. "I forgot." then he seemed to stare off into the distance.

"Alex?" Eagle asked slowly after the silence pulled on and Alex still had yet to move.

The voice seemed to snap the teen out of whatever reverie he was in because the next moment, he had spun on his heel and was stalking away from them. "I need to go and see Smithers. I'll meet you all in the reception area," he called over his shoulder, disappearing round a corner.

"What was _that_ about?" Snake murmured, voice incredulous as he stared at where Alex had just been a moment ago,"

"No idea," Ben muttered, glancing at the woman who had done Alex's disguise. She looked distraught, and when she caught Ben's eyes, her eyes widened and she muttered something about needing to clear up and scampered off before he could ask.

Raccoon spoke up a little anxiously, the mans grey eyes flickering onto Ben. "Is he always like that?"

Ben shook his head slowly. "No...not as far as I know."

Wolf's face was sombre. "This whole thing is weird, anyway." he stated in a matter-of-fact voice, crossing his arms across his chest and giving them all a powerful glower. "And Cub's never been a straightforward kid, too."

Nodding slowly, they allowed that thought to settle them momentarily, though Ben could not shake the odd feeling that this was something bigger than what was going on...

Shaking his head and resolving to figure it out later, Ben followed his teammates out of the room.

He'd find an answer to it eventually.

He always did.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

Calming down his recently erratic breathing, Alex pressed both of his palms into his eyes and breathed in steadily through his nostrils and out through his mouth.

_ Calm _down. He needed to _calm down._

Sucking in a shuddering breath, Alex slid his eyes from off of his eyes and straightened up.

That was a stupid mistake to make. Freaking out like that. Berating himself as he resumed walking again, he curled hi slip in distaste at the memory of his actions. It was _stupid. _He should've _known _that she was moving in to attempt to touch his eyes (my _eyes_). He shouldn't have reacted so violently. Now he'd just made a show of himself and gotten K-Unit to watch him more closely.

Well, he'd just have to do something about that.

Reaching the door he'd been aiming for, he felt comfort slide through him.

Something ordinary.

Something that never changed.

Smithers.

Knocking on the door, barely able to contain his impatience and excitement, he waited for the familiar call of _come in, my dear boy! _to sound cheerily from behind the door.

Nothing happened.

Frowning, making to knock again, he stopped as he heard movement coming closer towards the door and took a wary step back as the door opened.

"Ah! Alex! Please do come in, my dear boy!" the familiar voice sounded slightly strained as it spoke and Alex felt disappointment well in him.

"I could've found my own way in," he said stiffly as Smithers gently took his arm to lead him in.

"Ah, I'm afraid you most likely wouldn't," his voice was apologetic as he shut the door behind him. "You see, I'm working on a new project and it's taking up rather a lot of room. Careful here, my boy,"

Fighting down a scowl, Alex lifted up his foot over where Smithers indicated with a tap to his leg, choosing to reply to Smithers more interesting statement "A new project? Can I see it?" he said thoughtlessly, excitement colouring the words in bright shades.

Tense silence conjured into the air.

Alex's lips turned down, and he tried to force them up into a lighthearted laugh. It came out sounding more like a pained sob and he quickly stopped.

The silence layered itself more.

"Wrong choice of words," he muttered.

"Quite." Smithers' voice held the same strangled quality to it that Mrs Jones' had had.

Fingers curling into fists, the teenager felt his mouth dropping again, eyebrows turning. Alex suddenly didn't want to be in here that much anymore. "What've you got for me today, then?" he asked as neutrally as possible as they stopped in front of which Alex could only guess to be Smithers' table.

The man sucked in a heavy breath.

Alex just knew the man was gazing sorrowfully at him.

"I don't need it," he snapped, rearing back from the emotion of which he _didn't need. _"I don't _need _your pity," his voice was a near snarl.

Smithers' soft voice contrasted with Alex's sharp voice. "It's not pity, my dear boy. I'm just so truly _sorry," _he sounded utterly miserable. "I didn't mean for you to have to-"

"No one meant it." Alex choked out. He didn't _want _to think about such bruised and screeching things. He wanted to- he wanted things to go back to _normal! _"Just- just tell me. What've you got for me?" he forced his voice back to its normal pitch.

Alex's eyes followed the sound of rattling and when Smithers spoke again, his voice was quiet. "I suppose we should start with this piece,"

Alex forced himself to listen to Smithers talk rather than the hissy voice that whispered _it's not the same as before. It's never going to be the same as before. _

"This is to go on your recently pierced tragus on your ear."

"What does it do?" Alex asked curiously as Smithers attached it to the inner part of his ear.

"It's a feed of information. See it as a transmitter," Smithers voice gradually became a little more lively as he began talking about the things that he had made his living. "The colour changing eye drops that you placed in your eyes contained tiny feeds that link to this earring- making it an all in one device. Now, whenever you look at a form of text, the earring in your ear will read whatever your eyes are looking at right to you. And, just in case your director doesn't want you wearing the earring on set, I've got this-" he passed it to Alex who held it gently in his hands. "-which is simply a casing that cas be slipped into your ear. It does the same thing." Gently, he took the piece off of Alex, placed it in a box and then handed it back.

Grinning, excited at the new technology, he tapped at the table. "Anything else?"

He chuckled and Alex listened as he seemed to rout around in his desk for a while. "Ah! Here we have it!" Smithers called triumphantly. "This, my dear boy, is simply exquisite! This piece of technology allows you to measure the distance of rooms and the like as well as projectory and targets. I hear you have quite the fine aim, my boy. Well, this allows you to be able to determine the distance of objects and people as well as obstacles that are in your way. With this, you should find it very much easier to maneuver yourself through rooms- it'll help you get a stronger bearing of your area, at least." he slid the object into around the inside of Alex's ear. "Clear, too. No one will notice a thing,"

"Thanks, Smithers!" Alex beamed, pulling back.

"No problem, Alex. I'm sorry I haven't got anything else for you at the moment, but some things hopefully should arrive later on during you mission,"

Alex nodded and prepared to leave when he hesitated.

Maybe it was dumb-

Perhaps it was too hopeful, but...

"Hey, Smithers," he turned around again and almost meekly raised a hand up to the ear where his earring was, a rosy emotion of shy hope peeking subduedly out from behind his shoulder. "Do you think- think that you'd be able to- able to make something to help me..." he raised a softly slow hand up to his eyes, voice dropping to an embarrassed murmur. "Help me see again?"

Quiet.

Alex felt the peach hope slide away from him and he angrily cursed his _stupidity _for even daring to _hope _(though the thought had been nice).

"I'm sorry, my _dear boy," _Smithers sounded so pained, voice hoarse and tight with the feeling that Alex felt even worse for asking.

He shrugged, pretending that he _didn't _feel that heaviness in his chest at Smithers answer of negative. "No," he tried to laugh, taking a few steps back. "Pretend- pretend I never asked, yeah?"

"Alex..."

But Alex had turned before Smithers could reply and hastily made his way to the door, tripping over a cable as he went and near slamming into the door.

Smithers stood up in worry. "Are you-"  
"I'm fine," he barked, hands dragging over the surface of the door, attempting to find the handle. "Just- just _where's _your doorhan-" his hand landed on it. Composing himself, breathing in once, Alex turned, nodded at Smithers and left, the large man only able to gaze at the door with pain drenching his pale blue eyes.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

Striding away from the door, Alex made his way to the reception area but not before pausing and pressing his fingers into his head and screwing his eyes shut.

That was his _last _slip-up.

No more.

His last one.

From now on, he was _not _blind. He could see just as well as everybody else. OK? He _could. _He had to do this.

Feeling a little more confident, he removed his hands and opened his eyes.

A chasm of blackness stared coldly back.

For a moment, his resolve wavered and he stumbled into a wall.

No. That wasn't how it was going to go.

He pushed himself up and glared forward, challenging the Nothingness that stared back.

It was OK, though. He could do it.

He grinned, a feral taunt to his own blindness.

Mission, start.

_"Bring it on."_

* * *

**AN- *gasps and flops back, exhausted* I DID IT! YES! OK, there you are, my dears. **

** Guys, I have to say this- THANK YOU FOR REVIEWING! I WAS being serious when I said that it was the only thing that would motivate me to try and get some more out. I _know _it was a wait, and I'm sorry, but I needed to focus on other things. I do want to finish _The Price of a Collar _too, so, yeah. But this story is so much fun to write to! This Alex, if you noticed is nothing like my other Alex, so, yeah. **

**Now- REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW !and I'll try and make a goal of posting again say...next week? Ha! MAKE ME WANT TO GIVE IT TO YOU! *thunder cracks and I disappear only to appear behind you, whispering freakily in your ear:* reeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvvviiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeewwww www...  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN- Thank you for your reviews everybody! But, ARGH! Did I reply? Did I reply to **_**yours? **_**If I didn't, sorry! Please tell me and I will this time! I promise! Anyway, on with the chapter!**

* * *

"Seatbelts on, everybody?" Ben called to all the occupants of the minibus.

"Sir, yes, sir!"

"Yes, ma'am!"

Fox chose to ignore Eagle's comment and instead raised his hand to their driver who nodded and placed the vehicle into action.

When the bus started moving, Ben turned to Alex/ "So, _Milo, _when's your birthday?"

"August 15th," the teenager murmured, gazing out of the window.

"Yeah? Ever had a romantic relationship with anyone?" leaning over, he attempted to take Alex's attention away from the buildings they were moving past and focus on him.

Sighing, Alex didn't turn round but something changed and he seemed to aknowledge Ben's presense more. "No. I'm waiting for that _special someone," _a moment later, a grimace crossed his face. "Oh, that just sounded _cheesy. _I have to go round saying things like _that?" _

Eagle popped his head up behind them and grinned, leaning on the back of their chairs. "That's not all, Cub. Have you read how the gossip magazine cuttings we were given to study describe you?" his face suddenly went dreamy, eyelashes fluttering in exaggerated endearment. "'_The noble and cool prince with a husky voice that just sends-'"_

Alex blanched, waving his hands to get the description. "Shoot me now," he muttered amid Eagle's laughter.

Ben smothered a smile at the expression on Alex's face before he remembered something that he had been told hurriedly by the makeup artist before they left headquarters. Turning to Alex, he focussed on the teen. "I need to look at your eyes, Alex. The makeup artist said that you might have put too much of the colour changing liquid in one eye and too little in the other."

"They're fine," Alex nodded firmly, facing the window again.

Ben rolled his eyes. "Yeah. I need to check because you did it _yourself. _What if you've got one eye more intense than the other? You really want to blow your cover just from a silly mistake like that?"

"Alright. I understand already." grumbling, the teenager twitched around infinitesimally.

Ben stare at what little he could see of his still turned away head.

Alex glared at the window. "What?"

"I said: _face _me."

Grumbling again, he shifted minutely.

"Oh, for the love of-" Ben gripped Alex's chin and forced his face to him.

Two aqua green eyes stared balefully back before the teen wrenched his head away. "There. I _told _you they were fine." he said, already facing the window again.

Blinking, Ben nodded slowly.

Alex's eyes...they'd looked _vacant _again. Blank- as if he wasn't _focussing _on him when he'd looked at him.

Anxiousness began to squirm in the pit of his stomach. Had the mission Alex been on perhaps made it difficult for him to relate to people as usual? Maybe that was why he was being so loud recently. Perhaps he was trying to compensate for the fact- cover up for the crumbling truth that he was struggling to interact normally. That also _could be _why he didn't want that makeup artist to touch him. After all, hadn't he, Ben, felt the same way after certain missions?

_(Or am I just trying to make excuses for him?) _

No. That- that had to be it.

Yeah.

That was right.

"So, what's going on?" Alex's voice cut through his thoughts and Ben forced himself to concentrate.

"We're going home, Alex/ To our new luxury living accommodation."

"So, Alex," Raccoon was speaking, his voice curious as he peered over at the now platinum blond teen. "How'd you get involved with MI6, then?"

Raising his eyebrows, Ben turned to Alex, wondering whether the boy would answer. Truth be told (the fact being something that disgruntled the older spy), Ben didn't quite know that information himself. It wasn't everyday that a teenager got picked to be a secret agent. No. It wasn't _any _day at all, usually. And the fact that Alex _was _one (and a damn good one, at that) served to feed Ben's ever present intrigue.

Ben's ears twitched as the teenager cleared his throat dramatically, one fist pressed to his mouth- and immediately, all attention was fixed on Alex as he turned to face them, leaning in conspiratorially, his low voice enticing them all to lean forward, enraptured and anticipating the thought of being able to gain a little more insight into the mysterious teen- even Wolf leaned in a little.

"It was an odd day," Alex began, voice hushed. "The skies were dark the rain...not quite rain, more...splattery. A little like mist in the air. Or when you put your finger over a running tap and it sprays you. Or perhaps when you sit too close to that old headteacher, and when they speak, you get a face full of-"

Impatiently, they broke in with mutters of "get on with it", Ben shaking his head in mingled bemusement and irritation.

Glancing around again, Alex leaned in even closer, the seat creaking behind him as he pulled away from its clutches. "Well, I was already outside when the weather turned like that and I happened to have forgotten my umbrella. So, I decided to walk home. This time-" he paused, jaw tightening and eyes narrowing. "I took the short route," he near whispered.

"Yeah?" Raccoon murmured, completely taken with the tale.

"I didn't usually take the short route, not enough flowers, you know?" (By this time, Ben was a little suspicious of the truthfulness of the story) "But I went there anyway. But when I got to the last corner, I saw a man just _stood there, _umbrella out and just..._staring. _A hundred different thoughts passed through my head at that moment: _What does he want? Is he my long lost brother? Is he an MI6 Agent?_

"So I just yelled across the street 'Hey! You undercover from MI6?' and he went 'Yeah! What about it?' so I said 'Nothing much. Just walking. You know' and _he _said 'Yeah, I was just waiting for you, actually, wanted to recruit you' so _I _said 'Sure, why not? It's not like I'm underage and it's illegal to recruit me. Go for it!' so _he _said-"

Groaning, the SAS men slapped their foreheads, Ben long before having guessed that this wasn't the true story.

"Come _on, _Cub!" Eagle moaned.

"The_ real _version, please," Wolf growled, though Ben noticed that his lips were struggling with a smile.  
The teen glowered at them all. "Well, I don't here _you _telling _me _about how you wanted to be an SOD man or how _Ben _here got recruited,"

Ben moved uncomfortably as attention was shifted sharply onto him.

"Oh yeah..." Snake said thoughtfully. "I always _did _wonder how you got recruited."

"Go on," Wolf demanded, crossing his arms. "Spill."

Shooting Alex a teen which was blatantly ignored, he sighed and pulled a weary hand down his face, reminding himself of Alex's tricks in conversation. "It was a standard thing really," awkwardly, he shrugged. "They just noticed some aspects that I had and asked me whether I'd be willing to use them for the Secret Service instead of active duty. I liked their offer and so I took it."

There was a slight pause.

"_Bo-ring," _Eagle whispered behind him.

Irately, he twisted in his seat to glare at Eagle who was pretending to snore now. "Well _sorry _about that! Maybe you'd like to tell us how _you _got recruited by the-" he broke off and a mournful expression morphed his face. Slowly, he brought up a sympathetic hand to cover his sad mouth. "Sorry," he murmured. "I forgot. You_ didn't _get recruited, did you?"

"Ouch," Snake laughed at Eagle's mock angered face.

"Ladies," Cub drawled, a grin clear in his voice. "Let's all _calm down _now and-"

"We haven't forgotten about you not giving us an answer, Cub," Wolf broke in gruffly, a triumphant smile on his face as Alex's expression dropped to grumpy again.

"Listen, guys, I'd love to tell you. But, you see, if I told you, I'd be breaking this pact I have with my two friends."

Ben frowned, caught up despite himself. "What friends?"

"Whythehelldoyouwannaknow? and It'snoneofyourbusiness." If Ben wasn't rapidly growing used to Alex's sarcasm, he would've taken the apologetic tone in his voice for the truth. "Sorry."

Closing his eyes and ignoring the outraged cries from the other vehicle travellers, Ben rubbed a hand over his eyes and blew out a sigh, lips twisted into a bemused smile.

Would there _ever _be a straight answer with Alex?

* * *

"Don't you dare tell me this is where we're going to be living,"

Looking up at the sound of the horrified voice, Alex frowned at the window (though of course, he couldn't _see _anything). "What's wrong with it?" he thought he was meant to be a celebrity. Surely he wouldn't be living somewhere horrible.

"Nothing! It's just..._huge!"_

"Look! There's a _pool!" _Eagle yelled from behind him, and if Alex could hear the grumbles of his seating partner right, the man had stood up and was pointint excitably out of the window.

"Fat lot of good that'll do us, we live in _England," _Snake pointed out a little pessimistically.

"I've always wanted to swim in the rain," Raccoon said a little dreamily.

"Guys, it's _summer. _We've got _some _good weather," Fox replied, exasperated.

"I blame global warming." Wolf said darkly.

"We're parking, guys! We're _parking!"_

"Seriously, Eagle? _Pasrking?"_

"You're all acting like immature brats,"

"Like you can talk, Wolf. I saw your mouth hanging open when we passed that car garage,"

"No I-"

"We've _stopped!"_

"Cub's acting more mature than you lot!"

"Hey, Cub, like it?"

Startled from his content of simply being able to bathe in their noise, he blinked and then pulled on a look to show that he _had _indeed been listening. Blowing a bit of his recently styled hair off of his face he tried for an enthusiastic nod. "Looks great."

Silence met his words.

Frowning, he attempted to work out their expressions. "What?"

"Seriously, Cub? You sound about as excited as somebody would when told they were going to die tomorrow," Wolf explained (and Alex coiuld imagine his eyebrow raised, arms crossed and fingers tapping against his arms in increduility at his words).

"Well, _sorry _if I'm not squealing like a five year old girl." Alex grumbled, pulling his face into a light scowl. (Rule number 1 in distractions: Do it subtly, maneuver the _other _person into becoming the distraction rather than yourself.)

Shouts of protest met his accusation and, smiling a little knowingly, he held up his hands and shook his head amusedly. "I'm not calling _you _guys five year old girls. I'm just _saying..."_

Before any other arguments to that could be made, Eagle broke in.

"Guys! We've _stopped!"  
_

"We don't need you to tell is everything that's happening, Eagle!" Snake complained as the engine of the minibus did indeed turn off.

Alex heard a soft expulsion of air from where Eagle sat behind him and he could imagine him glowering and huffing at Snake. Lips twitching, he forced himself to turn to Ben _(he doesn't want to look at my eyes, he doesn't want to look at my eyes...) _and look up at him, raising one eyebrow and tapping a finger against the window. "What now?" he asked, pinpointing from memory and a quick calculation where Ben's eyes would be.

"Right," the spy agreed and then raised his voice, the slight creak of the chair belying the fact that he had turned round to be heard. "Listen up! This is where we will be staring for this mission. For today, all our details were to do was to grow used to our accommodation and to build up out confidence in each of our roles. The house for the time being is safe and clear, but after today we've got to be in role. The only time we can drop _out _of role is inside the house after we have all been thoroughly checked for any type of bug or camera."

Concentrating, Alex focussed on Ben's voice even as the man took a slight pause. He had to make sure that he really was listening. Unlike the others, he didn't (anymore) have the luxury of _seeing _so he had to pull apart Ben's words to suck dry as much desperate information from them that he could.

"You've probably all read the cover story, but just to reassure myself, can someone please tell me what it is?"  
Alex rolled his sightless eyes at the question. Really? It was like being in _school _again.

"Thank you for volunteering, Alex," Ben's voice broke in sweetly.

Exasperated, (_definitely _like school) he tipped his head back onto the chair and dredged up the information that Smither's gadget had read to him (he'd have to ask the man about changing the voice. It was alarmingly _annoying. _Too sugary. Like- like the voice had lived off of sherbet and candy canes. Ugh). "I'm named Milo Summers and am a new actor who lives here-" he gestured vaguely with a hand. "-with his manager George Shepard and his four bodyguards: dumb, dumber, even _dumber _and absolutely-"

"Alex." Ben warned, K-Unit growling in the background with Snake muttering that he was the first on the list.

Folding his arms and pulling a face, he amened the names. "Wolf-"

"Ha!" Wolf cut in triumphantly and then quickly shut up at the glare Snake shot him.

"-Snake, Eagle and Raccoon-"

"That's not _fair! _The kid doesn't even _know _me!" cried in pitiful objection.

Ignoring them, he carried on. "All of who will, for purposes of being brutish bodyguards have kept their codenames for 'intimidation' if anyone asks." he paused and then glanced to where he had heard Raccoon's voice coming from. "Except for Raccoon. He just wanted to sound cuddly. Like in Pocahontas. The greedy raccoon."

"That's not very nice," Raccoon moaned over the rest of their laughter.

"Well done," Ben interrupted as Alex opened his mouth to say more. "That'll do for now. At the moment, let's just go in and settle down. The room that will have been allocated to each one of you will have your name on the door." hearing the sound of multiple seat-belts unclipping, Alex swiftly followed suit; standing up and stretching languidly as he felt the bus move as the men trailed off of the bus, all talking with that blessed loud volume.

Happy to be surrounded by such telling noise, Alex was near grinning as he stepped down the stairs _(1, 2, 3- _he could hear their feet hit the ground) and followed the noise to where it led him, being careful to watch follow the sound of their footsteps lest they avoided anything.

(Mind the step...) Hopping into the doorway he was led t, Alex made a show of looking around, forcing an expression of slow-building excitement to show on his face.

"That's more like it." Snake approved from somewhere in front of Alex, no doubt taking in the teens 'excited' face and being relieved to see it.

(If only it was real.)

"I suppose we should all look round." Ben's voice came from beside Alex, and he turned his head accordingly. "Our bags should have been placed into whichever room we're in, so..." a rustle of clothing. (A shrug?) "Just go and have a look around the place."

Alex looked around as he heard footsteps moving away from him. He stood still in the middle of the...hallway and wondered which way to go. He'd have to move slowly lest he bump into-

"Come on, Cub! Don't just stand there!" a hand (belonging to Eagle) shot out and grabbed him by the wrist, tugging him away.

Swallowing down the rise of anxiousness in his stomach (he was being dragged and pulled somewhere but he couldn't see _where!) _he forced a lightly exasperated expression onto his face and quickly matched his footsteps with Eagle's as he was dragged uncerimoniously up the stairs. "Alright, alright! I'm coming!"

"Wow! Cub! There's a slide on the stairs!"

Twisting his head around as they moved towards yet another set of stairs _(...20 footsteps, 25 footsteps, 50 footsteps to the stairs-) _and he was hauled up them again, he made a grunt in the back of his throat to pretend that he understood.

Forcing down the want to put out his hand to grope at the walls, feel something solid next to his hand, he relaxed all his muscles even as he was tugged up another flight of stairs and led goodness knows where.

"See! The slide!"

Two hands pushed him forward in the back and he moved forward obediently to pretend to peer at the slide. "Yeah, looks cool," reaching out to touch the cool plastic and wondering what colour it was and knowing that he couldn't ask anyone to tell him.

A soft chuckle made him turn his head around.

The shove into his back was completely unexpected and for a moment, the breath left his chest as he was suddenly falling down, slipping everywhere, moving, falling, sliding-

-completely blind.

And it wasn't fun.

Struggling with his hands, he tried to put out his hands and stop the crazy black desent but he- he couldn't-

And suddenly, he'd stopped.

Lying there, eyes wide and flat on his stomach, bent over the end of the slide with his head near touching the ground, Alex stared blankly at the ground-

-sucked in a shaking breath-

0let it out again-

-closed his eyes-

-and just breathed.

_(Breathe)_

The sound of Eagle's laughter was loud from upstairs, and when the man called down to move out the way because he was coming down, Alex couldn't scramble off and away from the slide fast enough, almost slamming into a wall for his efforts.

Leaning against it, he steadied his heartbeat and rasping breaths, clearing his pallor just in time for Eagle to hit the bottom, whooping and crowing.

Alex smiled when Eagle asked him whether it was fun.

Laughed when he described the different colours inside of the slide.

And impatiently said that there were other places to explore when Eagle wondered whether he'd like another go.

"Right!" the man agreed, and Alex heard his footsteps quickly moving away and he hastened to follow them hurriedly, minding the stairs as he went.

Even as he was 'shown' the pool table, the games room, the TV room, he couldn't get rid of that stickiness to the palms of his hands or the slight strain in his chest when it came to smiling or admiring the rooms and objects.

Surreptitiously, he wiped his hands on his jeans (ignoring the tremble, ignore the tremble) and forced another sarcastic comment to Ealge's question.

Was...was too much noise sometimes a _bad _thing?

(But how could anything be worse than the silence?)

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

* * *

"Dinner is _served!"_

Alex stared down at his plate as it was clacked in front of him and sniffed subtly.

Peppery...a little like mince meat...he could smell herbs- basil and oregano, and..._garlic? _Garlic bread perhaps? A pasta dish?

"Thanks," he nodded to where he heard Ben sit down on what he suspected was the opposite side of the table to him. Gently reaching out his fingers to find a fork, he pulled it towards him and softly tapped the plate with his elbow to make sure he knew where it was before he could confidently tuck in.

"Did you guys see the size of that TV?" Raccoon hissed.

Nodding distractedly, concentrating on his meal, Alex nodded along with the rest of the mens mutters of "yeah".

"Pretty ridiculous if you ask me," Snake said, the tone of his voice perhaps giving to the fact that he had many times had this sort of argument and enjoyed it quite thoroughly.

"Well, if you've got the money," a pause that was probably filled with shovelling more food into his mouth, Raccoon continued, mouth still slightly full from the slight muffle to his voice. "You might as well spend it how you like."

"Hm," Wolf said, his cutlerly clacking against his plate. "I suppose so. Does seem a little ridiculous, though. Surely you've got better things to spend money on."

"I'm not complaining," Eagle stated matter-of-factly. "We get to _live _here. Whatever MI6 decide to spend there money on is _fine _by me! Go for it, I say!" had he raised his arm in the air with that statement?

Alex was too busy concentrating on his eating and making sure he didn't look like an idiot by missing the food on his plate to bother to contribute with the conversation. So when Snake asked for his input in the conversation, it somewhat made his fork slip and drop the pasta all down his top where it landed with a friendly _plop _on his jeans.

Alex stared down at the mess that he couldn't see.

"Tough luck," Raccoon said, but he seemed to be holding back laughter, probably getting payback for Alex making fun of his name.

"Right," he muttered, wondering _just _where his luck had gone or whether it had decided to pack its bags and go.

_You're still here, aren't you? _He thought harshly, cutting off that line of thought. _You're still alive? You could have _died _but you didn't. You survived and here you are. So _deal _with it, Alex._

"Perhaps you'd better get changed into something a little cleaner," Ben said, taking mercy on him as he was laughed at.

"Yeah, you're right." Standing up and making a point of ignoring their laughter, he made his way to the stairs and walked up them, quietly pleased that all of his hardwork in practising remembering directions had payed off to the degree that he could remember a place back to front as soon as he had mapped it all out in his head through counting footsteps, remembering objects, walls and of course, doorways and stairs. As long as he had walked up all of them (the stairs, not the walls), and touched the walls to gain a span of how long and wide the room was, he was fine in the regard of navigatiting around it.

Moving up the stairs and towards his bedroom, dragging his fingers lightly across the wall to count the doors _(fifth door...) _when he found the door he was looking for, he slipped his hand towards the handle _(right by my hip...) _twisted, pushed, and opened.

Shutting the door behind him and unconciosuly humming under his breath, he made his way to where his suitcase should be, right under his-

"Ouch," he cursed as his knees slammed into the bed. Leaning down to rub at them, he grumbled under his breath. "Got to remember that," he muttered, glad for the sound of his voice in the silence.

Kneeling down, he groped for a while under the bed until his fingers came around the case and he tugged, pulling the bag out and settling on his heels, he quickly unzipped his bag and stared pointlessly inside.

It was empty.

Of course it was empty.

It had, after all, felt ridiculously light when he had pulled it out from underneath his bed. He just liked- well, he just liked to have that ability to-

OK.

He wasn't kidding anyone. He was alone up here, after all.

(His humming kicked up a notch)

He just liked to pretend that he could see. And, pretending to see things that he already knew maybe- maybe just tricked him into believing- being able to imagine more realisticly that he _could _see.

It was stupid, a little dumb, so he slammed the lid of the suitcase back on and stood up, ignoring the lingering purple velvet longing that trailed after him in a lonely shadow.

"Now," he murmured, hands on his hips and glaring in futility around the room. "Where are my clothes?"

The most likely place would be the cupboard, so he wandered cautiously around the room, hands outstretched as he set about to find the cupboard.

It didn't take him long to find it, and when he had opened it, he set about to drawing clumsy hands up the clothes to check what he was actually pulling out.

To his horror, these weren't even his clothes.

Pulling back, eyes wide, he briefly stopped his humming and took up the noise making in tapping his fingers against the wood of his cupboard.

It made sense that they weren't his own, though, he thought, tipping his head to the side in understanding as the thought gained lit enterance to his mind. He was a celebrity now; it was obvious that his wardrobe would have changed. He needed to have a certain style now, not just ordinary clothes- he had to wear things that magazines would spot and pull apart to chatter over.

Pulling out a pair of what felt like jeans, he squinted at them, prodding them suspiciously with one finger. But that left him in a dilemna. He'd grown used to his clothes, constant hours of running his hands over them, gettign used to the feel of them and then knowing just what to wear them with due to the reactions of people who had seen him.

But these clothes...these were completely new.

"I could really use a bit of that Rider Luck now," he muttered, brow furrowed in light worry as he rifled through tops and jackets.

In the end, he had just closed his eyes (useless), whispered a desperate plea under his breath and then pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of jeans (he'd very conciously retreated from the suspiciously _leather _feeling trousers and the weird feeling tops).

Still muttering a plea under his breath to _please be OK to wear, _he pulled the clothes on and made sure they were the right way round before moving towards the door hesitantly and pulling it open; making his way down the stairs.

When he drew closer to the dining room, he could hear the sound of their voices, talking about the mission in slightly more serious voices, he stopped just by the place that as soon as he stepped through, he would be in sight of the rest of the men.

Slightly nervous now (because he _hated _to be laughed at!), he dithered a little, just hovering there and needlessly smoothing down his clothes with slightly uneasy hands, trying to ignore the fact that he had _no idea _what he had on and to just- just _go with it._

Breathing in, crushing his pestering self doubt like dried leaves beneath his feet, he stepped boldly out into the open, hoping the defiance on his face wasn't too noticable.

Conversation gradually filtered into silence.

His fingers twitched anxiously by his sides.

He hated silences.

Luckily (or unluckily), the silence didn't last long.

Bursts of laughter exploded out into the air like fireworks on a still night- their colours exploding in bliding vibrancy that he defensively raised his chin.

"What are you _wearing?" _Snake gasped out among the deafening roars of laughter that collided into one another.

"What do you mean?" he snapped quickly.

The question only seemed to intensify the laughter. "_Look _at what he's _wearing!" _Eagle sounded absolutely breathless with laughter.

"Are you trying to tell us something, Cub?" was Snake grinning, pointing? _What?_

"No fashion sense _at all!" _Raccoon wheezed during his laughter.

Face bright red (stuffing down the hurt and the burning in his eyes because he couldn't _see! _And he had _tried _but it was so difficult to know when he couldn't _see what he was puttign on!) _he finally clenched his jaw and turned stiffly on his heel and marched out of the room, laughter and joking wolf-whistles following him as he strode stiffly away.

Getting to his room, he slammed the door shut, yelling. "_Alright!"_

There was a pause in laughter, and then the noises started up louder than before, hooting at his demise.

Sliding down the door and gritting his teeth, Alex angrily wrenched off his top and flung it as hard as he could towards wherever.

Then hoped when he had calmed down he wouldn't trip over it.

Dragging his knees up to his chest, he pushed his hands through his hair and screwed his eyes shut.

A light knocking on his door disturbed his brooding.

"Alex?"

Ben.

Sighing a silent long-suffering sigh, he forced himself to answer. "Yes?"

"Are you OK?" the man asked from the other side of the door.

The hands in his hair clenched tighter in his hair, pulling a little at the recently colour changed hair and ignoring the sting. "I'm fine," he said tightly.

And really, he was. He just needed a little time to...calm down. Then he _would _be fine. He was just- just acting like a baby, really. Nothing else to it. He just needed to- to relax. Stop getting wound up and hurt over nothing.

There was a soft lull; as if Ben didn't quite believe what Alex was telling him (which he _prayed _he did) before the man started speaking again. "Don't worry about your clothes, Alex. That's my job to choose what you wear, anyway."

"I'm not _worrying," _he bit out, his voice doing nothing to back up the claim and he knew it.

"If you say so," the voice carried a hint of an apricot smile, laced at the edges in a delicate _something. _An emotion or feeling that Alex couldn't properly pick out or decipher. "Can I come in? It's a little weird talking to a closed door."

"No." he said, deadpan. "_Oow!" _he scowled as the door banged into his back, Ben trying to push open the door. "I said _no!" _he snapped. _"Ow!" _he shouted again as the door smacked into his back again. "Stop it!"

"Then get out of the way of the door," Ben said simply, a laugh evident in his voice.

"Just give me a second, I'm...naked." he muttered, falling onto his hands and knees to search for his t-shirt, drawing his hands through the fluffy carpet and attempting to find it with his fingers.

Finally, after a hurried and lumbering search he felt the material around his fingers, sorting it to the right way round and then pulling it on hastily, he called the man a little bad-temperedly in, still sat on the carpet, twisting away from where he must have been facing the wall when Ben came in.

"Hey," he said amiably, his footsteps muffled as he moved over to drop onto the floor next to Alex.

"Hey," he muttered in reply, flicking at his jeans.

"How are you feeling about the mission?" thankfully, he didn't bring up the clothing issue again and Alex leaned into the conversation hungrily.

Shrugging, he scratched at his eyebrow. "I'm OK. I know what I've got to do so hopefully it should all go to plan." he didn't bother saying how nothing ever really did go to plan when it came to him.

"Hopefully," Ben's voice didn't sound like he wholly believed Alex's words but he continued speaking, anyway. "How about the acting? Do you think you'll be OK for that?"

Alex stretched his mouth up into a humourless smile. "I'm a spy," he said simply, raising his hands in indication to the fact. "Acting is what I do best."

"Hm. True." There was again a small pause in the conversation and Alex stiffened, knowing something was coming and just being able to _feel _Ben's eyes on him, thoughtful and considering. "Alex," he began slowly, as if testing the water and thus proving Alex's prediction to be true. "I realise that this isn't your first mission, but...just be careful. You're not alone for this one so if you ever feel like you need help or you're worried about something, please just ask. We're not going to hold back from helping you."

Mulling over his words, Alex soon nodded and gave Ben a small smile. "I'll bare that in mind, thanks."

They were nice words, really.

It was just a shame that he didn't _need _help.

Something hardened inside of him at the thought.

He wasn't a- he wasn't an _invalid. _He didn't _need _help.

The offer was nice- warming, in fact- but the simple fact was that he didn't need it.

Ben's hand patted against his shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "I feel like you're not telling me something, Alex," he admitted quietly.

Alex froze into place but kept his face gently confused.

The subtle sound of hair against hair ruffling (shaking his head?) and a soft exhalation of air. "But it doesn't matter. I'm sure you'll tell me later," leaning in, breath a little closer than before, a smile? Pressured to meet the eyes that he couldn't meet, Alex dropped them, attempting to hide the obvious blindness of them through staring at the floor and tipping his hair over his eyes. "Or I'll find out myself." came the teasing words. "I _am _a spy, after all. It's my job to find things."

_And I'm a spy too, it's my job to hide things well, _he thought quietly, eyes still lowered.

It was going to be a ridiculous game of hide and seek.

Ben the cat and Alex the mouse.

His fingers tightened around the carpet.

_But that's OK, _he thought grimly, _I'm used to being the chased._

Before dark memories could enroach upon his facial expression, he pulled his lips up into a wolfish and challenging smile. "Catch me if you can," he grinned, hoping against hopes that he _wouldn't._

A light laugh, a hand reaching out and he stiffened, readying for the contact.

A hand settled itself on his head amongst his hair.

He could imagine the man smiling.

A smile he hadn't seen in months.

A smile he would never see again.

Gentle, soft, _caring._

_ (Hot, sticky and the familiar burn to his eyes that couldn't _see. _But he was all alone in the-) _Darkness had robbed him of that.

But he could imagine it all the same.

He couldn't work out whether that was a release- or a cruel curse- ever teasing but flitting out of his reach like a wind-borne nymph, flicking at him but darting away before he could catch it in both hands and hold it tight to him and never let it go.

"I'll hold you to that, Alex," was the fond voice-

-carrying a smile that he would never see.

x-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

Alex had grown to hate waking up and falling asleep.

Before he had lost his sight, he used to _long _for the time when he could just _close his eyes _and sleep.

But now his eyes were constantly closed.

He was constantly swallowed within that chasm of leering, taunting blackness.

And when he awoke, he often had to work out whether he was awake or not.

_(Get rid of that expectation to see anything other than dark,_

_ The light or the brightness or the sun's telling mark,_

_ Because everything will fade invitably_

_ and starless black is the only thing you'll see)_

"Awake," he whispered, a snow petal in the blackness, his fingers digging tight into the duvet pulled around him. "I'm awake." he steeled his certainty.

Yes.

He was awake.

Pulling out his arms from the warm embrace of his covers he fiddled with the watch and allowed it to speak the time into his ear- another little 'surprise' Smithers had implanted in his watch.

_3:17 _the clock said, low in his ear and Alex had to hold back the response to flinch from it.

He groaned, rolling onto his stomach and pressing his face into the pillow.

_Great._

Why on _earth _was he awake so early?

_Because you dreamed about seeing things that-_

Alex quickly sat up and swung his legs over the side of his bed.

He'd rather not visit such skeletal places.

Stepping up and stretching, his hair most likely scruffy, he decided to grab a quick shower and get changed with the clothes Ben had put out on his bed. It wasn't like he was going to be able to go back to sleep, anyway.

Yawning, he made his way to his ensuite shower.

Clean and refreshed and changed, he quietly opened up his door and slipped out, wary not to wake anyone else up with stumbling and banging around the room.

Pulling his trilby hat off; feeling a little stupid for wearing it inside, he made his way down the stairs, steps as soft as a panther.

Trailing his hand down the banister, he made his way into the kitchen, intent on finding something to do- even if that was only finding out where the cereal was kept before anyone could ask him why he was searching for the cereal when it was right next to him.

Finding the cereal after a few minutes worth of a search, he abandoned his search for a bowl and ate it dry instead, bringing it to the window where he sat down and stared out at nothing.

The thoughts came with all the warning of a bullet (which wasn't much)- as they usually did when the Silence came calling, asking hoarsely for victims to prey on.

_He awoke screaming this time._

_ The sound of his cry filled the whole of the Silence with a frightening and shouldn'tbethereshouldn'tbereal sound, piercing his sensitive ear._

_ He quickly shut up._

_ But then the Silence was too loud._

_ Rolling onto his side, he clapped his hands over his ears and dragged in ragged breaths, eyes wide but unseeing and listening only to the chaotic crash of his heartbeat and butchered breaths._

_ Curling in on himself, he tried to stop the ensuing tide of panic that washed up inside of him because he was _alone. _Alone in his own house that didn't _feel _like his own house anymore because he couldn't _seee anything _and now every sound was a threat and he wouldn't be able to defend himself properly because-_

-_A creak on the floorboards outside his room._

_ He froze._

_ The sounds got closer and closer, creaking and creaking and his door swished open._

_ Blindly, he stared out, made to make a shaking and defiant retort but a hand clapped onto his mouth, a scream rose in his throat-_

_ His eyes snapped open again._

_ Shakily, he dragged a hand over his eyes, the scream dying in his throat before it rose up._

_ Sitting up from where he'd fallen asleep on his sofa last night, fitfully listening to movies that he had seen before and now tried to place the pictures towards._

_ A- a _dream?

_Still breathing in short bursts, hands still shaking, he looked around slowly. _

_ No._

_ Not a dream._

_ Silence called softly for him, hugging every part of him._

_ He was still alone._

Glaring at the memory, he shook the glassy feel off of himself and stood up quickly (the walls suddenly seeming too tight, too close-) and made his way to the door.

The security lock on the door was an easily fixed problem as it had been written down in the briefing notes, and it was simple that he whisked out a key and slotted it into the door.

A small smile made its way onto his face as he hummed softly, barely audibly under his breath. Time to go exploring.

Clicking open the door and being careful to lock it behind him, he stepped out into the cool night air, pushing his hat onto his head as the wind pushed his hair about in a frustrating way.

Careful now, extremely conscious of the fact that somewhere in these premises there was a ppol about the place-

_-water ran down his face as he came up gasping for air, clinging onto the arm that held him aloft above the water._

_ "Please," and he was begging to _nothing _because he couldnt' even _see _the person. His voice dug at his pride, gasping, weak. _Terrified. _Water stung his eyes and he choked out some more water, hands scrabbling at the mans arm and sucking in greedy air, body half under water. "_Please, _no more! I- I can't-"_

_ The sudden push under water was so unexpected that his mouth opened and he was choking! Choking underwater but he couldnt' tell which way was up or down so he couldn't swim anywhere! He was- he was- he was-_

_ A violent hand tore him up again._

_ "PLEASE!" he was near sobbing now, clawing at the arm and kicking, kicking kicking kicking to try and get free to try, to try and break-_

_ -water filled his mouth again._

Snapping away from the thoughts with a sharp hiss, he shook them off like droplets of dirty water and strode anywhere. He needed to _walk. _He needed to _move _because he couldn't move away from the memories. He needed to- needed to _move._

Walking cautiously, Alex froze when after about forty-five minutes. His foot passed over nothing.

_The pool?_

Shrugging away the howls and shrieks of his memories (he needed to get _over _this fear!) he sat on the floor and pulled off his socks, not having bothered to wear shoes as he liked to feel the difference in textures under his feet.

Hesitantly, shuffling over to the edge of the pool, he pulled away the cover, standing up to cautiously walk around the whole length of the pool until he had pulled the whole thing off and it lay in a heap against the floor somewhere.

Then, sitting on the floor carefully, he slid his feet into the pool, shivering at the coldness of it.

Softly, singing a song he didn't even know what it was, he kicked at the water, his head tilted up as he wondered whether the sun was coming up and whether he'd be able to feel it kiss against his skin.

The sound of clicking alerted him to something.

He frowned and stopped staring at the sky, turning around, feet still dangling in the water, curious as to what the sounds were.

What _were _they.

"Milo."

He knew _that _voice.

Turning, he smiled at where he thought Ben was. "Nice morning, right?" he hoped his voice didn't sound too awkward, and he wondered over the sudden usage of his cover name.

Ben didn't respond to the greeting, but Wolf did, his footsteps and other approaching. "Come on," for some reason, he sounded extremely irritated. "You need to come inside," to Alex's surprise, the vocie passed him, carrying on moving.

Baffled when Snake and Eagle (he had grown used to what they felt like) lifted him up and away from the pool and led him inside, he twisted his head round, able to hear the sound of Wolf arguing with voices he didn't recognise, Raccoon's voice amid them,

"What's going on?" he asked, voice hushed as he stepped inside the house.

No one answered straight away and he stood there in the hallway with dripping feet wondering whether that was because they were staring at him in anger, confusion, amusement or any other emotion, or whether they generally didn't know.

"What's going _on?" _he repeated sharply, louder- disliking the fact that he couldn't see what their expressions were like.

Footsteps and the click of a door opening alerted him to the fact that Wolf and Raccoon had come back in. Moving out of the way and bumping into someone, he apologised in a mutter and returned to glaring at them all.

"What do you think you were _doing?" _

Alex pulled away from the angry voice and he narrowed his eyes at Wolf. "Will you please _explain? _Then maybe I can too." he near spat.

Another silence greeted his words.

Filled with...what?

"What do you mean you _don't know? _How can you _not know?" _Raccoon asked incredulously.

"I don't say words just for the sake of them!" he barked back, quickly growing tired of his needing to fish for every sort of answer.

"Didn't you _see _the paparazzi at the gates?" Eagle's voice was full of disbelief. "They were snapping pictures like _anybody's _business!"

Alex blinked at them all- maybe a little stupidly. He wouldn't know.

So that was what the clicks were.

"I didn't see them," he said under his breath, curling his toes into the carpet and leaning back, swallowing down the fear at the fact that people had been _watching him, _watching him and taking pictures and he hadn't even _known._

"I thought you were meant to be a spy?" Wolf's voice was scathing.

That hurt.

Months ago- months ago, he'd have been able to see them. He'd- he'd have been able to _see _them.

No answer to that sharp retort could be found in the constantly colour shifting valleys of his mind.

"Right." Ben said after a slightly uncomfortable pause. "I suppose that was your first taste of fame, Alex."

He couldn't find the energy to reply, continuing to stare at the carpet.

A small sigh. "It all starts now, Milo." the use of his fake name didn't go unnoticed by Alex. "In an hour we've got to get to the studio and meet the rest of the cast. You know what you've got to do, but we can't have you spacing out-"  
"I _wasn't _spacing out," he snarled.

Another pause (how he was growing _tired _of those _damn pauses _full of things he didn't _know!). _"That's not what it-"

His lip curled.

What it _looked like._

What it flipping _looked like._

Couldn't people do anything other than _look?_

"Maybe," he said, voice forcefully calm but oddly frightening, even he got shivers from using it. "You need to start using something _other _than your eyes." with that said, he shoved past and strode with liquid anger up the stairs to get some new socks.

Hands slapping a little forcefully against the banisters, he struggled to quench the rage inside him.

Hiding his blindness was going to be harder than he thought.

At first, he'd thought that it would simply be a matter of _hiding _some sort of problem; something that could be hidden. But it was hard. Blindness was- as much as he loathed to admit it- a part of him now. And denying it's existence was tearing at him too.

Worse, he realised he may have given Ben more of a hint into what was wrong.

Cursing, slamming his knuckles into his forehead, he realised that he was going to have to work even _harder. _Meeting the cast was today. He had to make sure that everything he did was _perfect._

A cold wash of uncertainty flushed over him.

But could he do it?

"WE LOVE YOU, MILO!" the sudden screams surprised him and he stumbled away from the window he had been passing, heart thumping in his chest.

He had to be perfect-

-and everyone would be watching.

Suddenly, he felt a little sick.

X-x-x-x-x-x

* * *

**AN- HEY Y'ALL! Well, I must say, your reviews really did enthuse me to write this chapter ASAP so thank you for that! KEEP GOING! You're all fabulous! Ha. Well, Alex goes to the studio tomorrow. I wonder how that goes...but then again...YOU'LL NEVER KNOW!**

**HA HA HA HA HACK! HACK! *coughs, thumping at chest as flails for water as angry reader holds the glass away***

**Joke...joke...it was a _joke! _Now gimme the water! *gulps greedily at water, spilling down chin and wiping away with a relieved gasp***

**I was joking. Seriously. **

**Do you wanna know? Think you already know? Wish you didn't? TELL ME! I do want to hear your wonderful voices!**


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